Another post by Keep it in Perspective has me thinking….

He writes:

“That must have been an awful three months for Phoebe. Thank God I only had to suffer through it for 12 years. Was Phoebe ever ripped off of her bicycle by a group of older boys while trying to get away from them, and then beaten to a bloody mess? How many times did Phoebe get the hell beat out of her in the school locker room? How many times did Phoebe have a knife held to her throat during an ROTC field trip? I would gladly have traded my many blood-soaked clothes for soda stains so don’t talk to me about relentless bullying.

And St Marys Mead, one man’s “smear” may just be another man’s “fact”. Should it be illegal to introduce embarassing or damning information about a 15 year old girl just because she is deceased and it stands to tarnish her name, familial perception, and public image? Trust me when I say that if Phoebe Prince had any skeletons in her closet that lead the jury to believe that her “bodily injury” was due to any one of a million possibilities, then they will have no choice but to find for the defendants on the charge of “violation of civil rights resulting in bodily injury”.”

First I want to acknowledge that this must be a fearful time for the families of the accused. It’s not hard to say that and try to afford them some level of empathy. None of us would want to be in their shoes now. But would ANY of us have wanted to be in Phoebe’s shoes then? Why can they not use the fear and trepidation and nervous stomach-gripping constant anxiety…the experience of being targeted with anger and disgust….to UNDERSTAND what this 15 year old child endured for months?

Why posts like this from an alleged “family member”…seeming to say Phoebe is to blame because , hey, I took worse? Do we make no differences today for the very real differences among us…do we not teach our children to EMPATHIZE ..not DEMONIZE…not TERRORIZE..those they find weaker than they?

Is the argument in the above post that if ONE PERSON can take severe bullying…no need to punish it…no need to hold Bullies accountable…we need to condemn anyone among us who cannot bear it?

So Blame Phoebe.

Not MY kid.

By that logic… Phoebe didn’t have “the right stuff”…so, maybe she didn’t belong in school?  Had no right to an education?  Deserved what she got?

YOUR kid should have been entitled to IN CONCERT WITH OTHERS…do, say, act, speak, push, shove. swear, threaten, humiliate, harrass, any and/or all of the above…as he or she pleased?

Any target should have been strong enough to take it?

If not, that’s THEIR weakness. THEIR problem.

I took it!

Is that the message?

Rather than deterring bullies, do we need to have training camps for targeted victims to toughen up? Shall we take them out of school till they can endure humiliation, derision, pain? Put the onus entirely on THEM?

Do we need to further create a society so desensitized to the pain of others, so empowered to use ugly words and so entitled to dismantle the psyches of others, that we condone the actions of the cruel…and blame those who simply can’t bear it?

How have we come to raise young adults who find amusement in defacing the memorial pages of a dead classmate?

Is this the kind of “strength” we want to thrive?

Survival of the Fittest?

That will be the message, in my opinion …if ANYTHING about Phoebe is used to ameliorate ANY of the actions of the alleged Bullies.

That will be the ultimate Free Pass taken to every hallway and classroom , lunchroom and school library…if there are  no consequences for Phoebe’s many, many days…trying just to endure in those places at South Hadley High.


4 Responses

  1. I find it quite telling…Those such as Perspective, asking everyone else to man-up,get tough,grow a thick skin,etc,etc…….But,when it comes to his relative and her partners in crime…Those charged, suddenly become delicate little flowers, unable to handle the scrutiny of their actions. We are asked to consider their FEELINGS…..We are expected to treat the accused with respect,dignity and with an open mind. I call BS on the lot of them. I’ll reserve those thoughts for those truly deserving. These monsters are deserving of everything coming their way. Just wait until the civil case develops…..That’s going to be a tsunami.

    It’s absolutely amazing the audacity of these parents and relatives of the accused. And of their completely uninhibited and unrestrained spawn.

    Austin Renaud,Sean Mulveyhil,Kayla Narey,Sharon Charon Velazquez,Flannery Mullins,Ashley Longe,et al. have no one else to blame,but themselves.

    Survival of the fittest? Outside of their vicious and incestuous circle of arrested development….They’ve proven themselves to be nothing less than vicious cowards.

    • You make an excellent point. How can any of those involved fail to look at their circumstances…and not see the commonality with this 15 year old child, Phoebe? Her world was that school. The law required her to be there. Life is no harder for any of the accused now…than the life they alleged created for Phoebe. I wonder if we will see any evidence at any future point that they understand this? Until they show some compassion, even now in her death, for Phoebe…it will be hard for others to have compassion for them.

  2. Survival of the fittest?

    This is the mentality of the bully and his/her supporters. The “fittest” right now in many parts of Mexico is the drug lords, the “fittest” in many parts of the world are the scary ones. The “fittest” was once Hilter.

    Survival of the fittest is what happens in the Jungle – not or should not in a school.

    So the defense is going to be blame the victim…like it use to be with spousal abuse and rape. Don’t think that works anymore. Discreting the victim is no longer acceptable. They are going to try and make it a “tit for tat” type of thing. The reputation of the bullies and the reputation of the staff at school are tied, so are they now working together?

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