See What They Made Me Do!

A lot of years ago, when the psycho-babble books were first catching on, there was one I liked called “Games People Play.” It was a short and amusing little tome and many of us could easily see ourselves in the descriptions of the “games”, excuses and manipulations the book details.

I myself could unfortunately identify somewhat with the calculating “Set-up” game…”Now I’ve Got You, You S.O.B!” wherein my confrontational nature and love of debate made me always a contender for the Starting Team. But the one that meant absolutely nothing to my life was the Blame Game…”See What You Made Me Do!”

I never played that game. Never even tried out for the Team.

My Mother wouldn’t let me.

I grew up in a household where culpability of “Somebody Else” cut you no slack. My Mother held to that “Jumping off the Brooklyn Bridge” theory of personal accountability. No one could MAKE you do anything. No bad behavior on anyone else’s part justified your own bad behavior either. No slip of ethics by another condoned mine in Mother’s eye. In my Mother’s credo, the whole world could, as she said, “Go to Hell in a Hat Box”…that was no excuse for any of her children jumping in the Hat Box too.

If the Jet Blue Flight Attendant who made the profane and dramatic exit from his job this week, had had MY Mother waiting at home, he would have been in no hurry to exit via the Emergency Slide…. and he would have needed more than two beers for courage. Mother would be waiting, unpleased… to say to him the words she repeatedly said to me…as I came to her with my complaints about mistreatment or disrespect at the hands of nefarious other people: “But what did YOU say? What did YOU do?” She would have seen his meltdown as evidence of his own lack of self-control.

No excuses. No slack. No sympathy.

My Mother understood in her own life that the world was an unfair, often unkind place, and now, looking back and remembering how much she loved us…I know she must have had to stifle her own maternal instincts just to comfort and condone her own. But instead, she raised her children to understand THEIR choices, THEIR behaviors had no mitigation from the bad choices of others. But the counterpoint to this view was that those hurtful words and behaviors, without our counter-reaction… could never really touch us. We would make a lie of them with our morally-superior response. Idiots were in charge of their Behavior; we were in charge of ours. Why link to them? Why make the connection?

As Seinfeld used to say…we ARE the “Master of our Domain”…in every sense…no one else.

But we live in a time where “See What You Made Me Do.” is National Policy. (Obama, I’ve heard, intones this excuse to his predecessor as he signs every lavish Spending Bill) But do any of you students of History really believe Obama’s progressive blow-out spending, his redistribution of national resources to Democratic political “Favorites” is JUST a reaction AT THIS TIME…to Bush? Do you really believe once ensconced in power, Obama would have governed differently if he had been preceeded by, say,… Clinton?

See What YOU made me do? Really?

If you read our national newspapers one might believe workplace “racism” is really an acceptable excuse for a known Thief in Hartford, Conn. to murder his coworkers. Progressive journalists try to convince us American foreign policy mitigates an Army major’s assassination of fellow soldiers. Progressive Journo-listers comfort each other on their secret forum by excusing plans to falsely accuse Conservatives of racism…as necessary to the greater good of getting a Politician elected. The Congressional Black Caucus field excuses that it is “racist” to expect them, as society’s past victims to accept the Congress’ present day tax code or moral standards.

All this Bad Behavior foisted upon these people by SOMEBODY ELSE! Progressives just drift through life at the mercy of others…embracing Victimhood because it is apparently, in their code,…a Free Pass. A Payback, an Entitlement to get away with reckless spending, dishonesty , dishonor, malicious political mischief…and these days …even murder.

The Chutes-and-Scatters Flight Attendant is a U-tube Hero. The Omar Thorton, Connecticut-Beer-Thief-turned-Executioner, a racial Martyr. Major Hasan a victim of God-Damn America. And Obama is just spending because Bush is making him do it.

A nation of whiners and moral freeloaders programmed to never have to accept responsibility. Victims who are therefore entitled to victimize. A whole generation taught that their special brand of hate, their special kind of retaliation, their special kind of lies, escapades and executions…are somehow EXEMPTIONS…the fault of others. And a President that embodies the very essence of this ethical decline and also that special sense of VICTIM entitlement. A President who calls for others to sacrifice while his arrogant wife entertains herself abroad at least partially at taxpayer expense…and sees no ambiguity in his own family’s behavior.

See What They Made Me Do?

Dear Mother, I’m glad you never lived to see the Games People Play EVERYWHERE today. Or have to live within the sorry, dangerous world that Mindset has made for us.

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3 Responses

  1. Our mothers must have been sisters – my siblings and I were raised on the same credo..”just because everyone else is jumping off the bridge doesn’t mean you have to as well….stand on your own two feet, that is why God gave them to you and while you are at it use the brain that you were given.”

    We were raised to see that life can be unfair. Some have artistic ability and some (like me) have none. Others are incredibly gifted athletes while others can’t hit the broad side of a barn with a baseball. There are those who are academically gifted while others struggle to comprehend simple concepts. Some families suffer with health issues of young children, parents, or grandparents while others enjoy rude good health despite smoking, ingesting fast food, or enjoying alcohol.

    We were never allowed to define ourselves by the opinions of others. Thus, victim hood could never be label affixed because someone else who have to be gluing it on. One can’t be a victim unless one allows oneself that status. Growing up, the comment of my parents that was the sharpest of all was that “you are whining”. Whiners were the lowest of the low.

    Obama needs a mother to say to him – stop the whining. You are president – a job you sought. Stop blaming your predecessor. Take ownership – set an example. Declare victim hood over. If he were to do this, he would go a long way to beginning to right this country. While I hope (the eternal optimist) that this might occur, I will not hold my breath (the realist) waiting.

  2. This victim culture is so damaging to kids IMO. Basically, besides teaching animosity, you are taking away your child’s sense of personal power.

    Our Mothers, cks, empowered us. This rampant false empathy abroad today stunts our children.

    I am truly sick of it.

  3. My school preaches that it “empowers young women” when actually it teaches enabling. No rule is firm (the dress code is just one example). Excuses are accepted for anything. It is the rare teacher who has rules that are enforced (I am one of those). Do not get me wrong, I believe in compassion, but I also believe in being fair. If you do not put your name on your paper, it is a zero, no matter what – test, homework, whatever. I remind daily, “make sure your name is on your paper” but there are those who think that the rules apply for thee but not for me. They quickly find that the rules apply for both thee and me in my classroom. While I am greatly feared before students are in my class, I undergo a transformation in students’ estimation by the end of the year (I write more recommendations than any other teacher is just one proof). My students tell me that though I am tough, I am fair. I am clear about my expectations and rules. I never get angry – sad, at times when they do not do as well as I hope, disappointed when they break the rules, but always hopeful that tomorrow will be a better day. I believe that they will learn and point out to them consistently the progress that they have made (to demonstrate to students how far they have come is important – it get them to see that nothing vital and long lasting occurs instantaneously, it comes as a result of little steps, sometimes even missteps that are then righted. It is not refusing to let them view themselves as victims (work too hard, teacher unfair. etc). I want them to see that they possess the power to sculpt their destiny, not have others do it for them. As I tell them, I do not “give them a grade” they grade themselves by the choices that they make. Did they decide to study or not; when they studied did they give the material their full attention; did they wait to the last minute; did they read or skim; did they ask questions about what was unclear, etc. That is empowerment. An empowered person will never let themselves be a victim. RCD and their families were empowered as was Tonya Craft. It would have been very easy for them to have given up.

    I read a review of a new book about Winston Churchill the other day. Churchill’s greatest strength was his ability to use language to frame a situation and exhort others to accept his view. His “On the Beaches” speech motivated a nation that it would never allow its collective self to be victims of Nazi domination – in the face of overwhelming odds the British persevered in no small part because they were empowered to do so by Churchill’s ringing exhortation. If only we here in the US had a leader who could provide that kind of leadership today.

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